February 5th, 2013
Oh, hey, menstrual cramps so vicious they make my entire ass-crack constrict! I remember these! I didn't miss them!
[EDIT:] Okay, you know what, fuck it.
Back when I was still on the pill, I was actually really good about taking it on time. In fact, I can only remember one occasion on which I forgot to take my pill. I did not realize that I had forgotten it until the next day, so, following the directions on the package insert, I took two pills that day.
About an hour later, I became completely aware of my uterus. Not as usual, as part of the tangled mess of tubes that fills my belly cavity, but as a separate entity entirely; my uterus had become an overfilled water balloon, nestled quiveringly within the bowl of my pelvic bone. Every time that I moved, it would lurch sickeningly forward against the inside of my lower belly with a sensation that I can only describe as wob.
It did not hurt. At worst it was sort of a dull ache. Walking, however, became a silent and trembling symphony of wobwobwobwob. I walked carefully. I did not want my uterus to spill out and explode on the floor.
Today is a little like that. But with more ass-crack involvement.
February 3rd, 2013
Another year, another set of mostly-mediocre Oscar-nominated animated shorts. Ho hum. Paperman will probably take the statue--and deserves it--although I suppose Adam And Dog has a chance of upset victory.
Weird as hell seeing a Simpsons short in the mix.
January 25th, 2013
Silent Hill 2 remains my favorite of the Silent Hill games.
My second-favorite Silent Hill game is the Fallout: New Vegas DLC Dead Money.
January 3rd, 2013
California Naturals canned cat food is some seriously stanky shit. Not only that, but--as I discovered the other night--it has the exact same nose-rending stank whether it is going into your cat's mouth at dinnertime or coming out of your cat's ass twelve hours later.
GODDAMMIT WHY DO YOU LITTLE BASTARDS HAVE TO LOVE IT SO
December 22nd, 2012
The following contains major spoilers for the Fallout: New Vegas expansion DLC Old World Blues, which is, by the way, awesome. SCIENCE!!
( This is pretty much why I play videogames, right here.Collapse )
December 2nd, 2012
For the purposes of conjecture, let's say that you are an irradiated mutant scraping out your existence in a post-apocalyptic desert wasteland.
One day you and your four closest friends are sharing a dented can of beans when you notice a man walking past, heading for the ruined town on the horizon. Well. You say 'a man'. What he looks like to you, honestly, is a mobile heap of weaponry. You have thirteen and a half fingers remaining to you, and he is carrying even more guns than that: long guns across his back, short guns at his belt, his thighs, his boots, wherever they'll fit. Some of those guns glow with the unhealthy sheen of radiation. In addition, he has a machete slung at one hip and an honest-to-gosh chainsaw at the other; those round things at his belt appear to be grenades, but they might just be mines.
He has a well-loved 9mm submachine gun in both hands, carried comfortably at waist height. His finger lays along the barrel just a hair's breadth from the trigger. He glances at you, once, then looks away.
Having spotted this apparition, is your first impulse to fling your beans aside and race towards him, screaming, in order to beat him to death with your bare fists?
If you said 'no': congratulations! You are smarter than Fallout: New Vegas!
November 11th, 2012
The most common thing(s) said to the household television whenever there's an Assassin's Creed game playing on it?
"... thank you, Shaun."
"Thank you, Shaun."
"Thanks for that, Shaun!"
"Shut up, Shaun."
"I love you, Shaun. Now shut up."
November 8th, 2012
|03:56 pm - because it's super-important that you be kept up to date on my gaming habits!!|
On The Rain-Slick Precipice Of Darkness 3 finally came out for the Mac, hooray! I enjoyed it, although I had some minor complaints about the badge system. Namely, it would have been nice to be able to just look at what skills were on a given badge, without having to put it on a character and then backing out of various menus four times. Eh, oh well. The retro look works for me, the humor works for me, and the actual combat was well done, although always a slog, because Penny Arcade likes to err on the side of every battle taking a long time and involving a lot of trading of blows.
Also the Precipice games like to plunk my magic fanfic twanger and that's all I'll say about that. No, wait, I lied: the best thing about it is that they do it completely on purpose. They know how they are coming across. I enjoy the feeling of being openly connived with!
So, once I finished that, I had to go play 1 and 2 again. Because... because! I even took and cleaned up this not-really-spoilery screenshot from the second game, so that I could have it on hand. That particular dynamic reaction shot has always been a personal favorite. For, uh, reasons.
Anyway, now that I've finished all that, it's time to play the new Professor Layton game! In thirty-minute intervals, because I have had so much eye surgery that I can no longer process three-dimensional images properly! But I will suffer any number of blinding headaches for you, Professor~!
Or... I could turn the 3D off. But it's so pretty!
November 7th, 2012
Q: How many pieces of Chris Ware's Building Stories compilation box can I read before the bleak banality of an uncaring, isolating universe overwhelms me, forcing me to huddle under the covers and stare at the wall?
A: Almost seven!
"Hey. Someone down the street is setting off fireworks. Refresh the election returns."
"... yep, they just called Ohio for Obama. So he's basically won."
So that happened! And I'm glad!
Although it looks likely to pass, they haven't officially called Prop 74, so I don't yet know for certain if I can get gay-married tomorrow; they've called Prop 502, though, so I can legally buy and smoke pot while I wait to find out. Dang. Party in my state? At least until the feds crush us underfoot?